Old and New

Author: Winter  |  Category: Marcus Monday, Marcus Schenkenberg, Motley, friends, hotties, relationships

In IT news… the damn board still isn’t moved. I keep getting errors. I need the SQL database god to come and snap his fingers and make it all magically move to where it’s supposed to go. I’m paying hosting on a site that isn’t up because I can’t move the damn thing. I may have to pay someone to do this. You’re wondering what this has to do with my title, aren’t ya? I’m trying to move an OLD message board to a NEW domain and hosting company. But the fucker isn’t cooperating. Or I’m just not smart enough to do this.

Moving on to other more pleasant subjects… My eyes are old. Officially that is. Yes, the doc gave me NEW reading glasses. Normally, the OLD part woulda depressed me. However, I was just happy to see clearly again and stop suffering from extreme exhaustion and major headaches. Anything within reach of my arms is a little out of focus for me now. Over the counter glasses from Walgreens helped, but I started feeling sick all the time especially the more I wore them. Turns out one eye is worse than the other so my prescription glasses address that and the lenses are different not the same. I worked all weekend on edits and Ride the Lightning and wow! What a difference!

On a side note about Ride the Lightning, there’s a character named Dave in this book. He’s a Dom who runs a BDSM club called Far From Heaven. He’s also Magia, one of the magical community in the Darkworld, so basically… he’s a wizard. He bears a superficial resemblance to my favorite Dave, but has no monkey sidekick. Maybe I should change that. I mean, every wizard has a familiar right? The book is starting to pick up speed and Vahid is now determined to save his self-destructive mate Emily. I’ll have to post a snippet when I’m a little deeper into the story.

Something happened recently and I didn’t blog about it in part because I usually don’t delve into my past a whole lot here. Anyway, more than twenty years ago, when I was pregnant with Motley, someone showed me what it means to truly be a friend. Kim Williams is ten years younger than me, but the woman has a heart of gold. I spent my pregnancy sick, broke, depressed, upset, freaked out, and just about any other emotion you could name. I literally had nothing. And I was so sick I ended up in the hospital the last six weeks of my pregnancy. It was one of the worst times of my life. I thought I was gonna die.

Through it all Kim was there. She took me to the doctor. She organized all her friends and my friends and took donations. She had the guys paint the used crib my roommate found at a yard sale. I mean, it was amazing. It went far beyond her making me eat and nagging me to take my vitamins. Just remembering what she did brings tears to my eyes. I felt so incredibly alone during that period and she made a major effort to show me that I wasn’t. There are very few people from my past that I love and admire more than Kim.

Sadly, we lost touch over the years. Mostly since I came to Southern California and more so when I moved to Orange County. My life with Rott has had a lot of ups and downs. Dealing with it on a daily basis didn’t leave much left over for anything else. A couple weeks ago Kim’s high school had a reunion. Somehow, and I sorta forget how, I had an old friend of hers on my Facebook. At the reunion, friends talked Kim into getting on Facebook and that is how we found each other again. I saw the notice of the reunion photos on her friend’s account and went to look at the photos. And there she was. Looking a lot like her mom these days but still with the long beautiful blonde hair and big eyes I remembered.

I don’t think I can find the words to say what it meant to me to find her again. I’m a sucky ass correspondent. I don’t write. I don’t call. Hell, lately since Rott’s been home, I don’t even Twitter and I miss it a lot but there are just not enough hours in the day at the moment. Something I’m hoping to rectify soon so I can have a better balance with things and have some time to enjoy chatting with friends and blogging more about the weird shit in my life.

At any rate, I’m a bonehead about keeping in touch with people I care about especially when I’m under pressure. I missed Karl’s birthday. Haven’t called Hilly like I promised. Keep forgetting to send Dave his prize… but I’m trying to make a more conscious effort to not let friendships – old and new – fall by the wayside. Finding Kim again is an important milestone. I really can’t afford to lose more people in my life. If you want to see the woman who singlehandedly kept me together and made it possible for Motley to be here today, you’ll find her on my Facebook. Kim Williams-Potts. One of my oldest, and even though I might not show it putz that I am, dearest, dearest friends.

So now for some Marcus. I need some this Monday. It’s month end at work and payroll so I’ve got tons of work to do and while I love my job, I hate being in the pressure cooker. I really need a Marcus to ease the stress.

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That goofy little smile makes me laugh. Laughter is good for the soul I hear. So all of you have a chuckle at the expense of Marcus’ goofy smile and make your soul feel better. Have a great Monday!

wintersig

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Take Away

Author: Winter  |  Category: Marcus Monday, Marcus Schenkenberg, hotties, relationships, worries

Last week I talked about how you can’t really make up time. I should know. I never have enough time. And since I never have enough time for things I enjoy, I’ve decided that some things have to go.

The structure of my life changed when Rott came home. I’d gotten used to the structure of life without his daily presence. Now, I have to get used to what it’s like for us to be three again. The adjustment has had – and still has – moments that are good and moments that are bad. I’ve grown to hate the feeling of fear. I don’t like the unknown and I like it even less when it scares me.

But in order to bring about a better adjustment to my new life that is sorta like my old life, but not exactly, I decided I needed to take away some of the many things I do to fill my time. So I quit my submissions editor job. By the end of this month, no more reading subs. I hate to let down the publisher, but this structure change in my life isn’t very smooth and a lack of time is why.

Next up is realigning all the websites and forums, consolidating them all at the same hosting company, but splitting off the forums that I shouldn’t be the sole-caretaker of. I’ve already shifted RottNRoll back to Rott and moved my graphics work to winterheart.com. It’s actually nice to have a true purpose for winterheart.com since it’s my oldest domain.

Once all the changes are in place – something I hope to have done by December – I should be able to hand off duties better. Then I can start scheduling my time so that I’m not pressed 24/7 by things. Now, if only I could stop joining in on writing projects that sound really cool… I’d have a lot more time on my hands!

I’m going to need to go on a search for new Marcus photos. I haven’t done that for awhile and I need some fresh stuff.  Anyway, here’s one from my stash. I have to admit, looking at him first thing Monday morning does do my soul good. *sigh*

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Hope you have a great Monday!

wintersig

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Make Up Time

Author: Winter  |  Category: Marcus Monday, Marcus Schenkenberg, Randomness, hotties

At work we have a form called the Make Up Time form. It’s for those days when you’re late back from lunch or you leave early or come in late from a doctor’s or other appointment. It basically lets you work a little OT to make up for the time you were gone. It works at the office, but in your daily life… no effing way. Once the time is gone, it’s just gone.  (Time is… fleeting… madness… takes its toll. HEH That was for ZAM.)

Trying to make up for lost time never happens and just frazzles us and places undue stress on already stressed out nerves. Yet, I keep trying to make up time. I know it’s pointless, fruitless, yet I do it.

Last week was a short week at the office because of the holiday. So I rushed stuff all week trying to do 5 days of work in 4 days. And because the holiday was on a Monday, but it didn’t feel like a Monday, Marcus completely skipped my mind. Man, I’m getting old.  Forgetting Marcus is a bad bad thing. Might need that Alzheimer’s test now.

So while I cannot make up time, I can make up for a missed Marcus. Here. Have two.

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Since I can’t make up time, I’m gonna have to hustle. I have a new contract with MLR Press, deadlines looming, and all my stupid little computer issues are fixed (I think) this time. Still buying parts one and two at a time for a new computer. Hopefully will have the new one up and running by the holidays. Meanwhile, the green machine seems better and happier now.

I’ve given RottNRoll.com back to Rott (you can tell by the Ozzy video on there) and redone Winterheart.com for my graphics stuff.  I even put  up a gallery. It’s a temp gallery because I’m moving the domain to new hosting in December and I didn’t wanna have to move a ton of stuff.

Still haven’t managed to move The Bar to its own domain. I swear you’d think I could figure the shit out but I keep doing something wrong. My concentration is shot I guess. All that trying to make up time is screwing me over I suppose.

So don’t make up time, just move on folks! And have a great Monday while you’re at it! *wink*

wintersig

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