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I found out last week that Mr. Fabulous lurrrrrrves Liz Phair. So tomorrow for Humpday Hotness, I will show you Liz’s nipples. Someone make sure Fab has smelling salts. Since this coming Sunday I will be Fab’s guest on Pointless Drivel Live, where he will surely kick my ass at Dead or Alive, my Tuesday Tune features Liz too. I just cannot pander to the man enough. I’ve been trying to get him over to my guilty pleasure The User Pool too. I can just imagine the conversations we will have once he too is reading this little gem of satire. Heh.

My Tuesday Tune by Liz Phair was used in the Bar Story because Liz is the physical representation of Carlisle Ross. To go with this song is a snippet from the Bar where I used the song. Although Alaric and Lex have shared dreams where they were much more intimate, this is their first real kiss.

I turned around and opened my mouth to ask Stein a question and found that he’d gone upstairs after Carlisle. That left me alone with Alaric. Shit. He was walking toward me, his electric blue eyes on me. I swallowed hard and felt my stomach drop as my breathing grew more rapid. My senses were on overload. When I looked at him, I felt my heart stop. When I smelled him. I felt my breath stop. When he touched me, I felt like I was going to come out of my skin. I had no idea what was going on. The dreams and visions…they were so real. I stared up at Alaric, wondering how I could have dreamed him. Even now, I could feel his lips on the curve of my spine. It was all I could do not to throw myself in his arms and beg him to love me. I didn’t know what the hell had gotten into me.

I turned on my heel and went up the stairs to the second floor of the penthouse. I heard and felt Alaric following me. I turned left at the top of the stairs and opened the last door. “This is your room,” I told him as I stepped into the room, pointing out the other doors. “That door is to the bathroom, which you share with me. The other door is to the sitting room, which you also share with me. The glass door is to the terrace.”

“Do I share that with you too?” he asked in that honey over gravel voice, one eyebrow raised inquiringly.

I nodded absently, wondering briefly if he was being facetious. “Dial 9 for an outside line, 0 for the front desk, and 1 for the butler,” I said and left him there, high tailing it to my own room.

Once there, I let out a long breath. This was incredibly hard. I should have been crying my eyes out over Johann, but suddenly I could barely think of him. Alaric overwhelmed my senses and brought every dream I’d had of him right to the front of my consciousness. He wasn’t like his cousin. He was … more. Taller, broader, darker, more handsome, more chiseled, more brooding, more … enticing … more sexy … more… hot.

I ran my tongue over my dry lips. What did I say to this man? Oh, by the way, I have the most incredible dreams about loving you. Or maybe, hey Alaric, I love how you look naked in my dreams. I ran a hand over my face. I was losing it.

Just then, there was a knock on my bedroom door. I opened it to find the subject of my thoughts standing there. He’d taken off his jacket and shoes and was standing there barefoot in his blue shirt and black slacks looking suave and so gorgeous. I was acutely aware of my disheveled hair, rumpled t-shirt and faded jeans. And worst of all, I had to look far too high up to meet his eyes.

“My suitcase,” he said in a low tone. “Is it in here?”

I looked at the pile of luggage and spied a large case that wasn’t mine. I reached for it at the same time as Alaric and my head bumped his. We both said, “Ow!” and stepped back. I stayed put in front of the doorway while Alaric untangled his bag from the others. Then he stopped and I heard it…Carlisle was singing.

Lucky I’ve been through hell
Backroads and shortcuts I know them well
Baby just stick with me
We’ll make it together, just wait and see

Do you really know me at all?
Would you take the time to catch me if I fall?
Are you ever gonna be that real to me?
Everything to me

The walls they close in
The air it goes out
We’re left with nothing but a shadow of doubt
Nobody talks, no one is here
It’s just you and me

Do you really know me at all?
Would you take the time to catch me if I fall?
Are you ever gonna be that real to me?
Everything to me

I found myself staring at Alaric while Carlisle’s beautiful voice rang out through the penthouse. I suddenly wished with all my heart that Alaric would love me. That he would feel, say, and do everything that had happened in my dreams. I knew instinctively that if he loved me, he would be just as he was in the dreams. He would love me the way my heart yearned for. He was a stranger to me except for what I knew of him from my dreams… what my heart knew.

Carlisle stopped singing, and I blinked back a rush of tears as Alaric turned away from my gaze. He stepped toward the door and I sidestepped to the left to let him out. But then, he stepped to his right, leaving us blocking each other again. He moved again, but this time I didn’t and he banged into me, almost knocking me to the floor. Anger at my helplessness to have any control over my life flooded me.

“Bloody hell, Kohl! You’re freaking everywhere! I can’t get away from you. You even invade my fucking dreams!” My voice was hoarse and overflowing with emotion. I jerked away from the doorway.

His arms snapped out, dropping the suitcase as he grabbed me by the shoulders growling, “What did you say? Did you say dreams? Cause I’m so tired of waking up hard, after spending my dreams with you.”

I stared at him stunned, my lips parted in shock. “What the hell?” I whispered. He had them too! What the hell was happening to us?

“Ah, fuck me,” Alaric muttered. He jerked me toward him, his head coming down as his mouth found mine. Electricity crackled between us as our lips met. The most exquisite pleasure I had ever felt seared its way through my body. Alaric must have been feeling something profound too because he moaned against my lips and ran his hands down my back to grab my ass, lifting me off the ground as his tongue swept into my mouth.

The touch of his wet tongue to mine was like a match to dry brush. I went up in flames as my dreams came to life. I wrapped my arms around his neck and thrust my fingers into his dark silky hair. He kissed me so deeply that if I’d had a soul, he would have touched it. I was drowning in sensation and then…I was on my feet staring wide eyed at Alaric whose chest was rising and falling rapidly with his jackhammer breathing.

“We need to talk,” he said breathlessly, his electric blue eyes boring into mine. “Not right now, but later. I want to know about your dreams.”

“What does it mean?” I whispered, suddenly frightened.

He must have known what I was feeling because he reached out a hand and tucked my hair behind my ear. “Don’t be afraid, Alexandria. We’ll figure it out,” he said softly in that honey over gravel voice. Then he turned and picked up his case, leaving the room. There was a soft click as the door closed behind him.

I reached into my jeans pocket and pulled out the handkerchief he’d given me, pressing it to my flushed cheek. I could smell his lemon bergamot scent on the cloth. I closed my eyes. Why would Alaric Kohl and I share the same dreams? What could it possibly mean?

Wishing everyone a pretty princess Tuesday!

It was a wild, wild Sunday on Blog Talk Radio. In fact, it was fucking Fabulous! First, there was a 2 hour Snackie Radio live from Jester’s house in NoCal. It was a VERY wild show. You can find the podcast here. After that, it was Hilly on Fab’s show, which was really just a continuation of the zaniness from her show. Here’s the podcast for Fab’s show. Next up was Turnbaby, who is REALLY fucking Fabulous. All in all, it was a wild night of BTR shows… except that there was a finale to this night that started after hours. It was a true after hours show that started at 8 pm Pacific time. Jester had a great 2 hour show live from his house with Hilly and other guests. Here’s the podcast. It was a fantastic night of radio.

Today’s Marcus photo is a black and white. I was gonna use one of the pics of him wearing sunglasses or the headband photo that I used in my very first incarnation of the Skankenberg avatar at Zanctuary. Instead, I found my eyes drawn to this picture. It’s a very low key image. There isn’t anything about it that just jumps right out at you. However, when you do look at it, click on it to see it full size. That’s when the symmetry of his muscles and the beauty of his bone structure leap out at you. It doesn’t hurt that his eyes have that come hither expression either.

On to the Marcus Award. I’ve added last weeks points to the total because it’s a recap week. Here’s how the point recap shakes out: Mary-85, Matt-66, Shinygal-60, Fab and Susan-54. That’s the top five. With Mary spending all her time as the mobile milk bar, someone else could totally take the prize from her. This contest is on until whichever week in June is a non-rent week. Which means, June 20 I think. The next recap will be June 9. There will be a break between the 20th and July 1 when the next contest starts. I need to come up with a different idea for awarding Marcus and I still need an idea for the Alaric Award.

In other contest news, I owe Jester a shirt, but I think he wants Dave’s cards instead. So when I buy Motley her cards I’ll order an extra deck for Jester. That tagline he came up with is perfect. The Absurdist got a Bite shirt (before I changed the logo) for inspiring the domain name. Still no winner on the Air France commercial, but I found out the director’s name: Daniel Askill, who is Australian. There’s still a chance for you to win this contest by finding out the name of the man in the Air France Pool commercial. If you go here, you’ll find some info on the commercial.

Hope you all have a great Monday!

I was gonna try for a Thursday Thirteen this week, but I ran out of time. I have one in the works that is about the first time couples meet in the Bar Story. The old love at first sight or not theme. Hee hee. So I wasn’t ready for Thursday at all. I figured maybe I should just take a leaf outta Matt’s book and post a pic of a body part for Half Nekkid Thursday. What to post though? Hmmm. Got a pic of the top of my head, my pierced ear, my purple pedicure, a fuzzy bra pic, and… a cleavage shot. Okay. That works. I was just talking about it at Zanctuary the other day anyway.

I tell you a good Frederick’s corset can make your C’s look like DD’s if you have someone who will lace you into it REALLY tight. That funny little smile on my face is really a grimace of pain. I. Can’t. Breathe. Ack!

In other news in my world, yesterday I got a picture text from Mary at My Two Cents. It was Mac! Yes, Mary finally popped. For those of you in the know, not only does Mary have a blog at My Two Cents, she’s one of the Bar writers. So this is our first Bar Baby!

Mac weighed in at 9 lbs, 21 inches. Ain’t he a cutie? Yeah, I know. He looks like all the other red faced babies who have just popped out. Still, he’s Mary’s kid so I figure he’s gonna be as ornery as his mom. Congratulations to Mary and Derek! Oh, and Mac? Here’s lookin’ at you, kid!

The Jester show was a lot of fun last night. Shiny gal wanted to call in, and Jester encouraged her to let him pop her BTR cherry, but like a lot of first timers, she was too scared! Maybe next week Jester can do some popping. Or maybe I’ll get her over to Karl’s show and let him do it… Hmmmn. What do you all think? Who should pop Shinygal’s BTR cherry?

Happy Half Nekkid Thursday folks! May your day be filled with cleavage and packages and so on!

This is my usual day to talk about Marcus Schenkenberg and post his picture. I’m going to do that in a moment, but first I must talk about the Sunday BTR shows. Karl started things off and things were pretty mellow. Then came Hilly’s show and the world turned upside down because she had Jester as her guest. After Hilly’s show we went over to Fab’s show. Fab was a little tired but Jester and Vulgar Wizard took up the slack. Then Jester prank called Irrelephant. I think that’s where things started to get REALLY funny. The prank call wound everyone up and when we went to Turnbaby’s show, Jester called in.

I don’t think I can even do justice to a recap of the show. All I know is that the chatroom was hilarious, the show was hilarious, and my ribs were sore from laughing at the end of 90 minutes. That’s when Jester got the truly inspired idea to pick another show and “Jester Roll” it. He dropped the link into Turnbaby’s chat and a bunch of us went the other show. The Super Size show was kinda odd. There were these two kinda crude-ish dudes on. They belched a lot. And there were some rude guys in their chat. Then Jester called in and it got funny.

It’s amazing to listen to Jester “work a room”, which is basically what he did calling those guys. They weren’t exactly the most open minded of people, but Jester handled them very well. One of the hosts seemed actually interested in getting other listeners for his show. The other guy wasn’t too tolerant of us. The one really interesting thing about about them was that they knew right off the bat where Hellohahanarf got her nick from. It was a very funny afternoon and evening for me. Especially funny was Othurme and the Bacon Blog.

Now, for my Marcus. This is a photo from when he was younger. You can tell mostly by the long hair. It’s the symmetry of his body that makes this photo awesome. I also like it because the water looks so cool and refreshing. After the near 100 degree heat here, I need something to cool me off. If only I was warm for a different reason, I wouldn’t mind so much. Usually, a mostly naked Marcus does warm my blood, but I think I’m maxed out on warm right now.

Next up are the Marcus points for this week. It seemed like a weak week altogether for comments everywhere, in part because some bloggers were out of town and others were observing the National Day of Silence on Friday. Since this blog moved and I didn’t do a Thursday Thirteen, it was a quiet week here. So the Marcus points stack up this way for the week: Marty-6, Mary-5, Matt-4, Shiny (gal) and Hilly-3, Shiny (guy), Metalmom, Jason X, the Absurdist, and Karl with 2. There’s a slew of others with one each. We’re drawing closer to the end of this contest!

A couple of final notes for this Monday. First, thanks to everyone who visited Socially Dead. My kid was so excited by the influx of visitors. Second, congratulations to my prize winners The Absurdist (for the domain name) and Jester (for the tagline). The Absurdist already has a “Batty” shirt headed her way. Jester, you need to email me so I can show you the shirts you can choose from. Next, there’s new Spewage at Projectile Spewage. If you don’t know about my little rant place, email me and I’ll send you info to get in. Thanks to everyone for the good wishes on my stupid back and the new blog site. This is my 80th post, so pretty soon I’ll be posting my 100th blog post. Doesn’t seem like I’ve been doing this long enough to have 100 posts! Have a fantastic Monday!

OH! PS: Othurme - You, me, 3 pounds of maple bacon, and the Bacon Blog recipes = BaconFest! Heh.

So I went to Walgreen’s and totally spent $10 on candy. Cadbury mini eggs, Cadbury creme eggs, Cadbury orange creme eggs, Wildly Cherry M&M’s, a very small Special Dark bunny, dark chocolate Kissables, and a bag of speckled jelly beans. Yum, the blue raspberry jellies are good! I have to admit, I wasn’t as into the Cadburys as I thought I’d be. Avitable got me all wound up to have the creme eggs, and they totally disappointed. Too sweet. Yuck. Milk chocolate. I haven’t had any mini eggs yet. All the dark chocolate stuff was the shit though, and the cherry chocolate M&M’s… Righteous.

Over at the Bar we’re working on some new terms so that our vamps and their backstory is consistent going forward. With 8 writers, sometimes things get blurred. I copied all my early Lex posts (from the archives - posts that originally were posted at Katie McAlister’s message board) to a Word doc. I’ve been looking at them and changing them over to our new terminology to see how it sounds. I figured this would be a good time to back track and give you the chance to read Lex from the beginning. I’m going to post a few links to PDF files of Lex’s early days in the Bar. On Tuesdays, with my weekly tune, I’ll post another PDF of the Girl With Fangs. Hopefully, you’ll be able to see how she’s really progressed as a character.

Bear in mind that not every post that involves Lex is included in these PDFs. There are posts where she’s mentioned, and a couple of posts with her and Johann having sex, but I’ve left those out. What I’ve collected here are the most important posts about Lex - Lex, Alaric, Carlisle, and the Mother of All Vampires posts. These are the posts that give you the most insight into Lex and Alaric and their relationship. She’s the first character I’ve written at the Bar whom I feel has had a steady progression from supporting character to full blown star. Also, you’ll recall that I’ve said before in this blog that Lex is the character most like me in personality. So if you want some insight into me, you might want to read these PDFs.

The Mother’s Mistakes
The Heart’s Chosen Destiny
Megabitch Meets Asshole
The Mother’s Orbs

My blogger story needs to be picked up once more. I really want to get Raphael’s POV in here soon. I’ve had him at the back of my head, ready and waiting to talk about this woman whose blog totally captured his attention and his emotions. I have a feeling once I open the doc, Rafe is gonna spill out all over the screen. The notion that something very real springboards from their posts and comments is very intriguing to me. I can’t wait for it to get to the point where McKenna opens her door and finds Raphael standing there. Heh heh.

I’m tired. It’s late. Or early, depending on your perspective, so I’m signing off now. Oh! One last thing. I was checking out Diesel’s humor-blogs.com yesterday. Fab’s pretty high up on the list of humor blogs. Impressive. I scrolled through all the pages, intending to discover exactly how many blogs were listed when I realized I am #267. Now, to you 267 is so far down it’s pathetically funny. To me, who doesn’t even think I’m in the least amusing or humorous, 267 is awesome! Then I realized that there were nearly 700 blogs on the list. For me, a blogger who started in January, to be 267 of 700 blogs (give or take) is a HUGE accomplishment. I am in shock and awe. Thanks to all my readers, because without you, I would probably be #684 or whatever the last blog’s number is on that list.

Hoppy chocolate Easter bunny eating day! Don’t choke on the peeps! And for those of you who follow the Sunday Blog Talk Radio shows… see you in the chatroom!

I never got around to posting (or blog hopping - sorry everyone!) this weekend. I got totally wrapped up in the Bar, writing sex scenes, arguments, vamps drinking blood during sex, introducing a new character who is the Blood Mistress, turning a hot couple into a threesome, psychos trying to kill their ex-girlfriend with a crossbow… all kinds of stuff. I had a very busy weekend at the Bar! Whew!

Then on Sunday, I was mired in Blog Talk Radio. Fab’s show was a little controversial. The 18 year old right wing Republican he had on made some comments about Iraq and she was sorta arrogant about it which totally pissed off Kyra, whose DH Dean is scheduled to go back there soon. Since I have a nephew who’s been to Hell Iraq a few times, I took exception to the 18 year old as well. Even MY 18 year old did. Fab smoothed it over though (by humming Taps), and frankly, I don’t think the kid even realized what she said, how she said it, or even sees anyone else’s POV. Sad really.

Turnbaby had the president of BTR on. That was interesting. Playing Quid Pro Quo with him and John Sweet who had shut down Kyra the week before. After that Kyra came on and it was the FUNNEST and FUNNIEST show EVER! Fab was on and Turnbaby and Shiny (the guy Shiny, not MY Shiny who is a luscious female) called in… OMG. I still cannot stop laughing. Fab called my kid, Motley, and that was amusing. Motley laughed and laughed. It was so good Kyra had to add a half hour to her show. I’m not gonna say what all happened, but I will say this… DEAN IS THE SHIT. If you haven’t been by Kyra’s blog, you should go. You’ll find a link on the right side panel.

So, I got the Dooney purse last week. I am still having orgasms over it. I want to sleep with it, but I fear I would get no sleep. Instead of inundating all of you with a dozen pics of the purse I will post just the one pic with Marcus (since it’s Monday) and give you this link - Dooney Giraffe Purse. That is a little photo record of my first real Dooney purse purchase straight from Dooney online. At the bottom of that page is the purse I was trying to get from eBay the day my battery died. Now, I’m glad I didn’t get it, because once I got a REAL one, I could so tell that the one on eBay was a fake! Anyway, I get all shivery when I touch the darn thing. It’s nice to buy something expensive for myself once in awhile.

It’s Monday, so I need to share Marcus with you all again. This is one of my favorite pics of him. I love him in underwear. It’s so… suggestive. So… yummy. And this underwear pic is more suggestive than most. Loaded. Yup. My sense is that Marcus is definitely loaded. In the Bar, I sometimes post pics of Alaric (Marcus) and I’ve been saving this pic to use when Lex gives Alaric these underwear and makes a joke about the brand that is plastered all over his crotch. Of course, as many Alaric and Alexandria posts do, this one (when I write it) is slated to end in a lovely sex scene. There is nothing finer than a post with sex between Al and Lex.

And now, it’s time for the Marcus Awards. This week we had a LOT of new people post comments. However, we still do not have the name of the Air France man. Don’t forget there’s a prize for that too. Here’s our Marcus winners: Shiny and Mary got 5 each. Fab and Matt got 4 each. Susan, Kyra, and Tempest got 3 each. Everyone else, including my kid Motley, got one each. The list was so long I don’t dare post it. I have it though, so not to worry. If you posted last week, I have your name!

The Marcus Award monthly recap numbers include the first month’s recap as well, so it’s a total to date, since we are at the half way point (sorta). Remember, this contest ends the last week of May and the prize will be awarded the first week in June, when the next 6 month contest starts up. At that point, if this blog is doing well, I may have to go to quarterly awards! WOOT!

Lots of people have won the Marcus Award since February, but I’m going to list only our double digit winners. If your name isn’t listed and you want to know how many Marcuses you’ve earned, leave a comment and I’ll reply with your total. At the halfway point, our leader is Mary with 24 Marcuses, followed by Matt-Man with 20, Susan with 17, Shiny with 16, Fab and Nicholas with 12 each, and Tempest with 11. I’m tempted to say, as Snackie does, Stalk Me Much? However, I happen to like this kind of stalking. I’ll be excited to send out a prize to the winner in June. If you’re not in the top 3, you still have a chance to win. Just read and post comments!

Have a great Marcus Monday and don’t forget to come back around tomorrow for a tune and another pic of that hot guy I posted for Mary last week that had all you ladies drooling.